About Dysthymia

Dysthymia is chronic low-level depression which lasts for two or more years, sometimes a lifetime, and is often confused with a variety of other types of depression. It only came into recognition in the 1980's when researchers discovered people with a different perspective on life. It's not unusual for people to go years without recognizing their Dysthymia until some event triggers an episode and pushes them into therapy. In addition, many people with Dysthmyia find it's genetic with a family history and harder to treat than those with non-genectic Dysthymia.

There are a lot of on-line medical and related resources on clinical depression and Dysthymia. An excellent one is Wing of Madness. The reality of Dysthymia, to me, is that it's a condition, and not a "disease". That doesn't mean people shouldn't be treated, but it shouldn't be labelled to add to the thoughts and feelings of people as having something bad. People need to be helped, not described as sick. This a minor distinction, but to those who suffer, it's not minor, it's personal and their reality. They need to know they can speak up and find help without suffering embarassment.

In addition, some people with Dysthymia suffer additional periods of deeper (double) depression, even leading to suicide. Often the signs of this aren't obviously visible. It's hard to describe the feelings during these periods. I can only describe mine as when you are surrounded by darkness at the bottom of a deep well, it's hard to see, let alone know, there is light. It's a spiritual black hole, an implosion of the soul. Reality is changed by your perception and state of being. It takes time to see through the darkness to life. Some don't (my nephew) and that's the sadness of it.

There needs to be freedom to express thoughts and feelings without embarrassment or the stigma of a medical label. "The terror and sorrow of a sensitive man who looked into the abyss, and saw, the abyss.", as described of Townes Van Zandt by a longtime friend in a radio interview shortly after his death, about his life and songs. Thank you Townes. You're missed, and your songs will always be with us.

Personal Essays

Clearly I can't begin to approach his writing and songs about life, but I can write what I experience and think about with my Dysthymia, with essays to my blog, which are listed below in chronological order.

Living The Edge Level Crashing Writing Respites
It's Life Death A Moment
Gliding Suicide Shadows Normal
Naps Suicide Two Years Some Days Rainy Days Time
No Drugs Answers Songs An Out Choices An Out II
Running Given Given 2 Still Me Moving Forums
Feelgoods Cloud Quiting
Pushed A Glass Optimism DSM-V Taoism Mind&Body
Looking Does Not Some Days LIfe Mortality Being Lazy
A Moment Issues Selfness Running Uncertainty Changes
Bottom Easier Video Changes Some Days Stop
Some Days Living The Night Life Naps Can I?
Some Days Don't Know Why Things Feeling Which
I'm Not Being Behind Feeling Thought Kerouac
Joy Sorrow A Life
Not Rainy Days Sunrise Obsolete Some Days Self Hate
It Won't Easiest Why Sometimes Sometimes Not Losing
Demons Some Days What If Thought Then&Now Why
Things Every Day Hopefulness A Time Hiding Canyon
Life The Body Choices Self Hate Death Want
If Eating Memories Why Not I Can't Be
Eating Change Hate Suicide Why Numb
Fog Wandering Myself Enuf Said Fits Nothing
Some Days What Rejection Simple Not Sure What To Say
Harder Hardest Some Days Suicide Sleep Youth
Means Do Not Drizzle Failure Outcast Fear
Not Mirrors A Life It's Not I Know Not Eating
Now Some Never Obvious Being Sane I Worry
First Thing DSM-IVTR Moment Being 19 Some Days Blank Mind
Lost The Two Normal Some Days I Used to Want to
Some Days To Smile
Smarter Emptiness The Last Grand Plan When Choice
Some Days Affairs Cheer Up Why is it Moment So, how
Mistake Things Falling Naps The Two Centered
Happy Shadow Nothing Raincoat Umbrella

That's it for this, I'll add links to essays as I write and post them.

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WSR V2.8, January 2013